The Gift I would Like to Give Final

A gift I would like to give, a life I could change, a person I could effect. A gift that could change the world, that could stop the pain and suffering, that is a gift I would like to give. Maybe something to live by, something that could change the course of someones destined journey.

My gift would be something to believe in. Something that gave hope to the world. A value? A person? A guideline? Any of which that someone could have faith in. Something that would give life meaning, and a chance to grow. It could be religion for some, it could be a companion for others. Something that makes life worth living.

“We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.” by Oscar Wilde.

Life, frankly is not always fair. People are losing hope quickly, the darkness filling their eyes rapidly. But then there are the others, the ones that can see the light at the end of the tunnel, the stars shining brightly in the dark sky in this case.

What would be the point of living if we didn't have something to look forward to, something that we could believe in. Where would we be? Where would the inspiration to live life to the fullest be?

My gift is for the people that feel alone in this world. When my dear friend told me, "I don't want to live anymore. What is the point? There is nothing here for me," I would of given anything to be able to give them something to live for. My friend is why this gift is so important to me, so he wouldn't have to go through the pain he would inflict on himself, which in turn, hurt me as well. He did things I know he regretted, but it was his way of dealing with his blurred feelings, the emotions he didn't understand. He has no idea how much he truly had to live for; a family, an awesome home, leaders and teachers that would of done anything for him, and people who truly loved him...including me. He didn't realize any of this though, and I just wish I could of helped open his eyes wider.

My gift of having something to believe in, could really save lives. It would help people understand and realize how much they have. They can see that the suicidal actions are pointless, that its really not worth it to do those things, because they could see that they would be working against everything that was good in their life.

Everyone on this earth, that lives, that breaths, all wish that they could change something in there lives. It could be adding something, could be discarding something, but they believe that it could make a difference in their happiness and satisfaction level. But our life is not like a words document, we can't edit what we don't like to make it better, we have to live with what we already have. This gift would help people focus on the positive, it would give us a real reason to keep moving, keep living in this frequently degrading world. Just because the world is trying to make a point by bringing us down, doesn't mean we have to go down and fall into the trap.

This gift isn't something that can happen automatically, we need to work on developing it. People need to just begin to see the good.This world is truly filled with a lot of crud; a lot of things that want to leave us helpless, things that want to swallow us, to make us no more. Its so hard to see the beauty behind the bleak ugliness that seems to cover many of our lives, but the point of this gift is to be able to see past the cloudy visions, and to see the brightness that is in all of our lives somewhere.

Many people feel like life is just to hard to deal with. I know in my life, I've felt worthless, the darkness felt like it just encircled me. I couldn't see through the fog that seemed to box up around me, its deadly attraction to me wanted to smother my vision of the goodness that really was in my life. At one point, I had completely given up on myself. I thought, why is this happening to me? When will this change? Why can't life just let go of me so I wouldn't have to go through this anymore? But one of my dear friends told me one day, why are you doing this? Can't you see how many good things you have in your life? So snap out of it, you're ridiculous. That was a shot to my heart for sure, but those harsh words really saved me. I saw that I really didn't have anything to complain about, and that I truly did have many things that made my life good. That person is someone that gave me hope, which brought me to realize that I had many things to believe in.

This subject, makes me want to give more than a gift, more like a miracle. Its always so painful when a dear loved one finally gives up, gives up on their lives, by completing the final task. You feel like a wonderful gift was wasted. And all that runs through your mind is, what could I have done to help them? To help them see what they truly had? This gift could really save someone, someone who has blurred vision and who feel unstable. The heartbreak and the loss could really be cut down, and rejoice could really replace that. You wouldn't have to see the crying mother, father, or dear loved one who just don't understand the reasons, but to see the happiness that should fill their eyes.

I truly wish I could give this gift to anyone who truly needed it. I know how it feels to feel alone in this world, to not see any hope, but truly, there is always hope, and I hope that this gift would help people see that. This world needs something to believe in. This gift could cure a case of depression, to saving someone's life, to saving the world. How would this world be if the hope could help overcome it's struggles?

A Gift I'd Like to Give #1

A gift I would like to give, a life I could change, a person I could effect. A gift that could change the world, that could stop the pain and suffering, that is a gift I would like to give. Maybe something to live by, something that could change the course of someones destined journey.

My gift would be something to believe in. Something that gave hope to the world. A value? A person? A guideline? Any of which that someone could have faith in. Something that would give life meaning, and a chance to grow. It could be religion for some, it could be a companion for others. Something that makes life worth living.

“We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.” by Oscar Wilde

Life, frankly is not always fair. People are losing hope quickly, the darkness filling their eyes rapidly. But then there are the others, the ones that can see the light at the end of the tunnel, the stars shining brightly in the dark sky in this case.

What would be the point of living if we didn't have something to look forward to, something that we could believe in. Where would we be? Where would the inspiration to live life to the fullest be?

To be continued...

The Poem about Love

Do I know what love is?
Peace, security, selflessness, passion?
Could it be that all of these are true?
That when I look into your eyes, I see your spirit, your soul,
That I am entranced by your gaze, the sparkle and electricity that entices my soul,
That when I look at you, I see a life in the future that includes both of us,
A ring on both of our left hands, that attaches us forever,
Picturing us growing together, older and older,
Always having the fire inside,
It never dying,
Always wanting,
You ask me, isn't that a while away?
Yes, but just looking into your eyes makes me know that it can be real,
A love so pure, that inside, I know its meant to be.

Life Story

You live your whole life, looking for the right person.
You compare, you observe.
You love, you break.
You learn, but sometimes it's too late.
Your heart gets broken, too many times.
It lays into to peices all over the ground.
But then someone comes around.
And you are someone that needs to be found.
They come to you, with super glue,
And put your heart back together, to make it brand new.
The feeling I get, when I'm around you.
Brings light into my heart, a love so true.
I searched, and I lost.
And paid some hefty costs.
But now I know that love is true.
Ever since I met you.

I Remember

I remember the first day I ever watched Spongebob Square Pants, and I fell in love with my future husband, Patrick Star.
I remember when this one kid in my Spanish class in ninth grade threw up all over the back of me.
I remember eating Milk Duds until I threw up on my eleventh birthday.
I remember my first kiss, on Homecoming night. :)
I remember the day that I met him.
I remember when I stepped on my group's final structure project and broke it in half, but the worst part is that it was worth about 75% of our final grade in my 7th grade engineering class...I've never been treated the same since...
I remember seeing Zac Efron's glorious masterpeice of a face in the first High School Musical.
I remember the day I went to my first concert, Hilary Duff, in 6th grade, heck yeah.
I remember going to Warped Tour a couple hours after I got picked up from EFY, two very different, pretty much opposite atmospheres.
I remember being a boy crazy fool all throughout junior high.
I remember falling off my bed during efy, and my cousin taking a picture of it.
I remember running up the stairs from the dark basement, literally sprinting, because I was scared someone was going to pop out from the darkness and grab my feet.
I remember when I saw my big little brother cry, tour my heart in peices.
I remember when I got surgery on my foot, definite water works day.
I remember my child development robot baby, I loved my baby Dan, I hated giving him back, like they were almost taking a peice of me.
I remember... life...

Journal Entry (Stan #11)

We were strolling down the pier, gently holding hands as the sun began to slowly set on the most perfect summer day. The sand started to be molded between our toes, I giggled at the feeling. The warm, tan, and almost sparkling tan crystals were almost like powder, it was so pure. The water was beautiful, it was clear, and bluer than the sky.

"It's so beautiful out here," I whispered in your ear.

You smiled, "not as beautiful as you."

You squeezed my hand tighter, and we began to frolick into the tide. The salty water sprayed us in our faces. I grabbed a handful of muddy and wet sand, and threw it at your face. You laughed and put your arms around me in a really tight bear hug, and then began to lift me off the ground and spin me around. I squealed into a laugh, and I held on to you tightly. You let me down, and gave me more of a gentler hug, and we both giggled and kissed. It was truly a perfect day, happiness was overflowing my heart, and I just felt like I had to catch the memory of this wonderful day.

"Hey babe, I want to go get my camera from the car, I will be right back." I grinned.

"Okay, hurry back though, I'll miss you! " you replied and laughed, "I love you."

"I love you too." I went over to you and gave you a quick kiss, but it was probably the most magical kiss we had shared yet, and I didn't know why.

I ran off to the car, the hot black top was burning the bottom of my feet. I hopped into the passenger seat, and started to look for my camera. I looked all over the floor and under beach blankets and baskets, but I couldn't find it anywhere. I looked for it for about 45 minutes, and I was expecting for you to come back and see why it was taking me such a long time, but you never did, but I didn't pay much attention to that.

I kept looking for the camera, until, all of a sudden, an ambulance came flying into the parking lot. Two men hopped out of the driver and passenger seats, grabbed a stretcher from the back, and began running towards the water. My heart began to pound, and I jumped out of the car and began to run to the water as fast as I possibly could. When I finally reached the edge of the sand, I watched in horror as they lifted you (my finacee) out of the water onto the stretcher, and put a sheet over his face. I followed them back to the ambulance, my legs feeling like jello. My heart felt like it had stopped, and I fell to my knees, tears began streaming down my face, the saltiness started to burn my eyes. I watched as they rolled your body into the ambulance and shut the big white doors. I saw a man standing next to his car with his cell phone in his hand on the other side of the parking lot.

He walked slowly towards me, "did you know him?"

"Yeah... he asked me to marry him this morning," more tears started to fill my eyes.

"Oh, I am so sorry for your loss," he patted my arm, "I saw him, he was getting deeper and deeper into the water, and there was this wave..." he looked down at his feet, "I saw him struggling once it hit, and I tried to run over, but the waves were too strong, and they just kept coming and pulling him down. So I called 911, but it was too late."

I gave him a hug, "thank you."

"No problem," he said, "do you need a ride, or do you need someone to talk to?"

"Its okay, but thanks, I'll just follow the ambulance to the hospital."

He nodded and left to his car. I slowly walked myself to your car, and slid into the driver's seat. Your cologne still filled the car, the sweet scent filled my nose. I looked at the ring on my finger, the little diamond sparkled. I slid it off of my finger, and held it in both hands. I brought it to my lips and kissed it. I held it near my heart. My eyes were closed, the salty tears dripped from my eyes. "I could of saved you, I could of saved you from drowning, if I would of just stayed."

Impulse 2

John: "By the way, your paying."
Kasey: "Ummm, ok." (looks puzzled)
John: "Ya...so... so look really pretty tonight, I like your dress."
Kasey: "Thank you! You looked like quite a.. "
John: " A stud? Yeah I know, anyways, sorry for spilling punch all over you at the dance."
Kasey: "Its no big deal, my dress was just white, now its pink."
John: "Its hot."
Kasey: "Okay...thanks."
John: " Did you have a good time at Homecoming with me?"
Kasey: "Yes, it was great!"
John: "Oh I know, its just because you were with me."
Kasey: "Sure."
John: "Oh you don't need to be modest about it, you were with the hottest guy there, it probably made you seem actually a little hot."
Kasey: "Yes, because that's all I really wanted." (Rolling her eyes)
John: "Oh, I know!"
Kasey: "Oh crap, I don't have any money with me."
John: "Well what kind of date are you?"
Kasey: "Excuse me?"
John: "Okay smart one, how...do we pay... if you don't have money? "
Kasey: "The guy that takes the girl out actually has money! Duhhh!"
John: "Lets go!"
Kasey: "What?! We can't, we haven't paid!"
John: "Shut up and hurry! We have to go before any of the workers notice!"
Kasey: "I'm not stealing."
John: "Lets just go!"
Kasey: "Let go of my arm!" (they run out the front doors)
John: "Yes! That was a close one! Tell me where you live again."
Kasey: "It's fine, I'll walk myself."
John: "Okay, lets get the kiss in then."
Kasey: "Get off of me!" (she slaps him and begins to walk away)
John: "Fine, jerk."