A gift I would like to give, a life I could change, a person I could effect. A gift that could change the world, that could stop the pain and suffering, that is a gift I would like to give. Maybe something to live by, something that could change the course of someones destined journey.
My gift would be something to believe in. Something that gave hope to the world. A value? A person? A guideline? Any of which that someone could have faith in. Something that would give life meaning, and a chance to grow. It could be religion for some, it could be a companion for others. Something that makes life worth living.
“We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.” by Oscar Wilde
Life, frankly is not always fair. People are losing hope quickly, the darkness filling their eyes rapidly. But then there are the others, the ones that can see the light at the end of the tunnel, the stars shining brightly in the dark sky in this case.
What would be the point of living if we didn't have something to look forward to, something that we could believe in. Where would we be? Where would the inspiration to live life to the fullest be?
To be continued...
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This was amazing. Gave me goosebumps. I will be the first one to read the finished product. No kidding!
ReplyDeleteThis is very good! I enjoyed reading it. This peice showed deep feelings.
ReplyDeleteWhat I read: The beginning was dramatic, and was a good start for the essay. It's set the first person, and the writing makes it seem as if the author has the power to change everyone's lives.
ReplyDeleteYou said that everyone has dreams, and they can fulfill them if they put in enough effort.
What I think you're doing: You're looking for a way to inspire people into doing great things. You're trying to persuade them into taking action. (In other words, trying to make life exciting).
Suggestions: In my opinion, there isn't a whole lot that needs to be fixed. Perhaps you could make a bit longer, so you could go into detail as to how you will motivate these people.
I'm getting that your gift is hope. It's really good but i'm not shure what it is you exactly want to give.
ReplyDeleteI think one thing that you could do better is maybe go into deeper detail? other than that i dont really know. this was pretty good, pretty dramatic but it didnt sound heart felt to me so if thats what you wanted maybe you could try and improve that.
ReplyDelete